redstar's Diary
yeah. i really shouldn't do this anymore. but i do.
Added: February 9, 2006, 9:34 pm (
71 views)
last night i came to some sort of realization that i'm probably the most friendless person around. we had out FA greenhand/chapter degree ceremony and cake auction last night, and that was kind of fun. surprisingly, 13 students got their greenhand, which is awesome. and the cake auction went well with mr. bennett. thank you so much.
i ended up hanging around the office with the teachers and steph, nikki, mike, and dan until about a quarter to ten last night. you know you're a loser when you send an hour that late at night hanging with your teachers, of all people. anyway, i'm definitely the fifth wheel in that group, and that's something i really don't like.
is there some rule that i don't know about that makes it illegal to be single, or something? maybe it just seems so with valentine's day coming up, which i could care less about. V-day i have an electrolysis appointment, and at night i think i'm going to head over to a session of the quiet corner fiddlers. i've always wanted to check it out, and now i can. i'll bring my violin, even though i can't really play. it's a start.
anyway, moving on... it's like all the friends i though i had just aren't there for me. none of them ever call me back. and then the ones in school... well, they're off in their own little worlds. even kelli... she's just been acting retarded-weird this week, and none of her friends get it. she needs to grow up and stop trying to be emo.
pastor pat was saying on saturday night something about how teens hate being lonely the most... and i never really thought about it before. i never had that problem, or actually, i have. i just find other thing to do, and remembered my "true" friends. but now they aren't there. i don't get it, and i feel like the most worthless person in the world right about now.
whatever. i deal with it. and i'm really hoping that college will look up, way up.
joyce was trying to take a vacation over feb. break, and she wanted me to house sit for her and feed her horses in lebanon. she couldn't get a flight, so she might go in march when i have that 3-day weekend. she wouldn't come back until that tuesday, but that would be so cool. and, i'd get paid really well for it... yes!
this could be looking
very good.
no one knows about the ski trip, since jason won't talk to me. thanks a lot, dude. what the fuck did he have to go to haiti for, anyway.
this is just a really rough week, for no reason, really. i've been pissed off at everything, and everything's just sucked.
there's a light somewhere, i guess. now i get to go find it.
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