Aaron Saray's Diary

I'm so confused about Chivalry

I've tried to come up with this chivalrous male persona - I thought it was polite to do it, etc.  I've come across multiple articles from esquier (here and here) that give some of the newer thoughts girls have about chivalry, and it just confuses me and pisses me off.

First of all, understand: I'm not being chivalrous to 'get something' from you or because I think you 'can't do it' - and that seems to be the new 'independent woman' attitude.  Let a guy be polite, for pete's sake.  I want to hold the door open to show respect to you, and you say "I can get the door myself."  Those replies just start sounding like a 5 year old (you know - when they say I can cut the steak myself, mama).  

Its still not equal:  a lot of top jobs aren't with women yet - even president is still male.  So girls - I'm not condescending you - I'm trying to make it right. 

So this all brings me to this: I don't know how to be chivalrous anymore if its all taken the wrong way.  Is it even worth it?  And then, when I might give up cuz I think its not worth it - is the girl that cares going to be upset?

So girls - do me two favors: The next time a guy is nice to you - like opens the door - accept it graciously.  (Note: some guys get confused if a girl holds the door open for them...)  And two - be more clear with the guys - I know you think it would be great and perfect if a guy could read your mind - and any guy who can't is worthless - but lets face it - we just can't.  Just tell us! :)