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Pablo's Diary

Family... Peer Pressure... Not Caring...

Added: October 6, 2004, 8:44 pm  (71 views)
My bro is having problems @ school. Kids being mean, and this really bothers him. This can be a painful thing for me. I wasn't too bothered by what people said to me in high school. Maybe a bit, but not as much as he. He's too young to really understand a lot of things, so I wouldn't have any idea how to help him get over some of this stuff. I fear that if he doesn't find a way to cope with it, he'll turn into a very disturbed person as he grows older. I hope things can work out, but I have such an immense feeling of helplessness, it's terrible. I try not to dwell on it, and it doesn't put me in asshole mode or anything, but I feel very bad that there isn't something I can do.

I don't really spend enough time w/ my bro. I need to start making time to spend with him. I think it's pretty important, 'cuz we may not be geographically close forever, so we should be taking advantage of that while we can.

Staying in touch with family and loved ones becomes very difficult as you get older, I've started to learn. My immediate family lives close by, and we don't see each other very much. Many nights, I don't feel like doing anything but coming home and gaming, watching a movie, etc. Then I feel bad about not spending more time with them. Life can be difficult a lot. Wish all my family and friends were computer geeks, like me, and we'd have a lot in common to do together and talk about. The weather is interesting for only so long. ;)

So that's my thought for today - keeping in touch with family, spending time with them, and the feeling of helplessness when they are trying to deal with a problem and you can't or don't know how to help them. It is incredibly frustrating. Makes me leary of a day when I might have kids of my own. You know - how I'd handle similar situations....

Same thing goes for friends that move away, as well. I read about BigA struggling with this a lot, and I know how he feels. It gets hard to find things to talk about and keep in touch about after people move away. Weird, because you'd think having not talked with someone for a long time, you'd have a lot to catch up on, but it seems to work the opposite. More to talk about with people you see everday, and less with people you see once or twice every year.

Too many damn emotions that plague and bless our existence. *sigh* One of the very things that makes us human, I guess. I don't remember anyone ever saying it'd be easy, but I always seem to feel cheated when I realize it.

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