Escapist's Diary

i dont know why i'm frustrated with this

sometimes almost having something is worse than having not having something. although i spend more time with mouse, i find i am more jealous than ever of the time we dont spend together. moving closer has solved nothing. (other than having his drunk friends attack me with kisses and hit on me until i feel like a whore...and this is getting to be a problem...shouldn't he stick up for me?) since i can't spend every day with him...i think i would rather go back to being more casual...once a month type of thing again. although, he doesn't see it that way. how could he ever understand? i liked it when we had two separate lives and together we had our own world. now, it is nothing like that. i still love him and feel like we are compatable...but i don't know if i can handle the semi-long distance relationship. i'm pretty sure i want all or almost nothing...rather than being  a part time girlfriend. i guess that's what i've moved up in the ranks to....a part time girlfriend.

ps. valentines day still sucks.