Escapist's Diary

Dear God

Added: February 8, 2007, 8:52 am  (62 views)
Dear God,

You have not responded to my prayers that I have been sending your way. Are they too selfish? I pray for everyone, not just me getting on the bus (which i miss on average 2.4 times a day). Are you busy? Too busy for me? Well, I am sending you a letter, read at your leisure. I'll be here, I have no where to go.

I love you God. I really do. I wake up and appreciate every moment I'm allowed. I try to help others. I try to live right. Please explain to me if I'm doing something wrong. I really hope not to offend you.

You see God. I am broken. You gave me Mouse, but you gave me no way to deal with him. How do I act around him? I have more pain than anything else in this relationship. But when I am with him...the world changes. God, please help me be fair to him. I do not want to hurt him anymore than I want to offend you. The pain I cause him just causes me more pain. Give me the ability to watch what I say and weigh my options. Also, if you don't mind, he's looking for an internship this summer. You know he's a hard worker. Look out for him.

God I am broken. My body is failing me, I have so much pain. It is nothing compared to those with terminal diseases, but I ache. I try to be healthy and keep in shape, but I am now limited. Give me patience to let myself heal and will power to not destroy everything I have gained.

God, I am broken. The less time I spend on gradaute school applications, the less I am sure of where I want to be. I want to move north to be by Mouse...but that school has temporarily closed the program i want to enlist in. What is graduate school if I'm not going to be happy? In addition, my boss has yet to finish my application forms. God, give her time, peace of mind and ambition. If there is something in her life preventing her from writing them, help her. Is that being selfish?

God I am broken. I am selfish. I am human. I want a car although many people go without food. I want a trip this March and many go without shelter. Help me be less selfish.

God, I used to think you had a telephone. One with a great big answering machine. Maybe you get mail too?

Sincerely,
me

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