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Enrico4luv's Diary

To just cry...

Added: June 17, 2004, 12:38 am  (43 views)

I needed to cry tonight....

been needing to cry actually...

there's something botherring me and i don't know what it is...

I guess am just lonely...

or maybe....

Saturday while at the ice cream place with my sister and my nephews and niece... Kendrick came up to me and told me that i couldn't share a drink with him since his mom told him not to.... i was hurt.. but i knew i had to let it go... at the same time i was feeling that there's more to it...

When we got home... that's when i found out more... more of which i wished i didn't... Kendrick then went on about how he can't even share food with me and or anyone else.. but then specifically targetting me since... his dad actually told him that once i take a bite of his burger... he's not allowed to eat any more of that burger and that he, his dad, would throw it right after...

i guess i remember that most since that was the one that hurt me the most... i felt so small.. so disgusting.. so worthless..

I guess i felt that something was wrong with me... something ... anything... as long as it was me... i was the fault...

Flashbacks went through my mind..

maybe they don't want me here no more... maybe i need to go away... maybe... since this is the 6th or 7th place i moved into.. maybe i was unbearable....

And that's where i am now..

feeling unbearable... the explaination of why i am alone... and why i have no one...

i guess...

more like i wish..

i had somewhere to go..

someone to talk to...

someone to tell this to...

i need to be held and told to that i will be comforted...

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