AmerJL's Diary
Bruses Fade Father But The Pain Remains The Same!
Added: November 28, 2005, 12:15 am (
97 views)
Around the holidays it's hrd to be with out a loving ffather but songs like this help me remember how much better i am that he is gone!! I am so lucky that things are not worse then what they are.... but yet no matter how much i hate my father i miss him and thats hard.... it's like a lose lose situation! I am so angry for the this that have happened and i can't bring my self to forgive him yet no matter how many times my friends and family say i should... but i just can't yet! and who knows if i ever will... but at the same time.... i wish i had a real family like i did for that short period of time after he came back into my life! but now he has screwed things up to the point of no return in my book! all i relly know is that he may be my FAATHER but he will never be my DAD!
~Amy~
Once upon a time there was a girl
In her early years she had to learn
How to grow up living in a war that she called home
Never know just where to turn for shelter from the storm
Hurt me to see the pain across my mother's face
Everytime my father's fist would put her in her place
Hearing all the yelling I would cry up in my room
Hoping it would be over soon
Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK
I often wonder why I carry all this guilt
When it's you that helped me put up all these walls I've built
Shadows stir at night through a crack in the door
The echo of a broken child screaming "please no more"
Daddy, don't you understand the damage you have done
To you it's just a memory, but for me it still lives on
Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so, so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
It's not so easy to forget
All the lines you left along her neck
When I was thrown against cold stairs
And every day I'm afraid to come home
In fear of what I might see there
Bruises fade father but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK
I'm OK
Entry Comments: 1
Add a comment to this entryagreed
Added: November 28, 2005, 4:13 pmBy: redstar
reminds me of my own life... i oftentimes, too, feel like i've been robbed of my father due to alcoholism. it rather sucks.
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